Stinsman
Rita V.
(nee Lind) On May 3, 2013, of Washington Twp. Age 89. Beloved wife of the late Arthur J. Devoted mother of Mary F. Law and her husband Thomas and the late Veronica Oakley and Audrey Stinsman. Also survived by her son-in-law William Oakley II. Loving grandmother of Bill III, Karen and Paul. Proud great-grandmother of Bill IV, Eddie, Megan, Grace and Kelly. Dear sister of Lillian Rumaker.
My grandmother passed away, not quite three months after my grandfather, and in a away, it’s fitting. They were born four days apart, grew up on the same block in South Philadelphia, were married, and lived their entire lives with each other. It didn’t make sense that they should be apart now, after a lifetime together. And so, we pray they are together once again, in eternity, enjoying each others’ company before God in perfect bliss.
My Grandmother was an amazing woman, filled with tremendous love for her family, and an almost unlimited capacity to care for those in need. We will sorely miss her.
She was the kind of person who was at her best helping or taking care of others, but hated being taken care of. Perhaps, this was because since her earliest years she was a caretaker; the eldest daughter in a Depression Era household she took care of the home and all the children living it, while both her parents were at work. After high school, she studied to be an R.N. at Einstein Medical Center, and upon graduating, she traveled to Texas, where the Army Air Corps had stationed my grandfather, so they could be married.
Soon after their marriage, they started a family. My Aunt Ronnie was born first, my Aunt Audrey two years later, and my mother (the Benjamin of the family) was born seven years after that. Sadly, Audrey was born hydrocephalic with profound special needs. She couldn’t talk, couldn’t feed herself, couldn’t even move. Yet, when the doctor’s suggested she put Audrey in an institution, she refused, and took excellent care of her until Audrey died from pneumonia at age 14. It was Audrey’s special needs that prompted my grand mom, when she was pregnant with my mom, to pray the Rosary again and again, telling the Blessed Mother that if this child was born healthy she would name the child after her, and thus my mother is named Mary.
While she and my grandfather, were raising this family of three beautiful girls, she was also nursing at Lourdes Hospital, where she spent many years caring for the ill and infirm on the Med/Surg floor. And despite the loss of Audrey, she and my grandfather raised two remarkable women, one of whom they were also to lose, many years later at the age of 48. This was my Aunt Ronnie, who developed a very aggressive form of breast cancer and passed away within a year of being diagnosed. Just try to imagine that, try to wrap your mind around being a mother and losing all but one of your children. I can’t. Yet during that awful time, she managed to summon the strength to help care for her, as she wasted away before her eyes. Her other daughter, my mom, is now the only one left of that beautiful little family of especially loving people, that suffered so much loss. And if you ever meet her, you can see what all the people in that family must have been like.
To us, her grandchildren, she was, as I see it, the embodiment of what every grandmother should be. She loved all three of us unconditionally, and was there for us whenever we needed her. If you came to her about anything, be it good or bad, she would listen attentively as if you were the only other person in the world, and give poignant advice where needed. She was even there to listen after she became almost deaf, though sometimes it was questionable how much she heard. And though, perhaps, they didn’t get to know her as well as the rest of us, she intensely loved her great grandchildren and they all know just how much she did. In reality, she loved all her family that way, not matter how closely or distantly related.

She was a truly amazing woman, of a caliber not often seen in today’s world, and I feel the most fitting words to end this memorial are those of my grandfather, which it seems, I all too recently quoted in his memorial. As you will remember, in them he refers to her as Ronnie, the name he called her by until they named their first daughter Veronica. “Now this is Ronnie. Nice sounding name, isn’t it? She is to be my wife someday. I am going to spend my life, loving her, keeping her from all harm. We will have children someday. We will be a symbol of all that is right and true. Take a good look at her picture and understand somewhat why I love her. The picture has failed to show what Ronnie is, but my heart tells me what my Ronnie means to me.”

Relatives and friends are invited to attend her viewing Wednesday 10:15-11:15 am at SS. Peter & Paul RC Church, 362 Ganttown Road, Washington Twp. Mass of Christian Burial 11:30 am. Interment St. Joseph’s Cemetery, Chews Landing.

In lieu of flowers donations may be made in Rita’s memory to the Veteran’s Memorial Home, 524 North West Blvd, Vineland, NJ 08360-2895. Arrangements are under the care of the Egizi Funeral Home, Washington Twp. Condolences may be shared with the family at www.egizifuneral.com

“A Life Well Lived
Is Worth Remembering”